Paradox

I don’t want you but I do
I want another one but you
This one should be you
That’s why I don’t know what to do
I’m set to a paradox

I’m frozen but I feel you
Far when I’m close to you
I’m okay but I contradict
To you I’m such an addict
You set me to a paradox

I didn’t search but I found you
I’m blind but I can see you
I’m quite here but right there
Paralyzed but moving everywhere
You set me to a paradox

I’m sane but I’m gone crazy
I’m faking but I’m being me
I’m slow but I’m running to you
I hate you but I love you
You set me to a paradox

 

Like Everybody

You’re a simple boy

A kid with a toy

You watch cartoon

You dream in moon

You go to school

You date girls and you play the fool

Somebody break your heart

And you cannot sleep at night

You pretend not to cry

You seal it with a perfect smile

“Say guys out there!

Take a picture of me

Don’t wonder, don’t stare

I’m just like everybody

You’re a silly boy

Sorry, you annoy

You try random names

You play stupid games

You win, you lose

You tell some jokes

At the end you’re alone

With some numbers in your phone

Everybody lie to you

And yes you can do the same thing too

You seem like you believe

But you go back to your fantasy

“Say guys out there!

Let’s have fun you and me

Don’t act like you don’t care

I’m just like everybody”

“Say I love and I hate

What I live but I’ll die

It’s not too late

For me to fly

I’m good but it’s bad;

I seem happy when I’m sad

And so weak. I’m strong

When I’m right or wrong

Don’t you know that I’m a superstar?

But I’m not that famous

And I’ve been the king of the world so far

Isn’t it ridiculous?

Think I’m crazy?

I don’t even have enough money

I’m neither poor nor rich

I’m in a level you can’t reach

I love what I got

I believe in God

I don’t wish you meet people like I knew

I’m not here to explain what I’ve been through

And whenever you’ll be judging me

I’ll keep on saying I’m just like everybody”

Aphasia

Hush ! Crush ! Rush !
I see you…A trouble
I lost it all, I lost control
Can’t focus on what your sweet mouth was saying
I try to slow my heart down after all, but
Those burning eyes, burning “I”, burn in “Ai!”
Killing smile, terrorizing body
Would you share an apple with me?
See how you’re disturbing my mind?
Tip of my tongue, oh your tongue
Speak my heart, speak so hard
Draw a dream, work of art…damn you’re hot
Love is like rain
Wets the brain
And here something else will last wet…
Can’t neither remember what I just felt
Nor distinguish twink my right and my left
Everything in me in suffering
You’re next to me, I’m flying, yes I’m frying*
My A B C listen and see
The way I’m one, three, six, es, eh, ex
B, boiling blood
Feel me, free me, fill me, sweat flood
Adrenalin
Trembling
Get closer we may understand more
Fix up my language
Let’s get more knowledge
You screwed up all my memory
You’re Alzheimer
And I’m in hysteria
Your smell plus the fever
Amnesia, your lips and neck, aphasia
I hate you I don’t know
Psychology
Blah blah blah
Biology!...
Cut the drama!
Behave love, act it extremely
And how much you need me, ma, emm
No strategy, go in
A tragedy
Slave and so much saliva
Bad how, to resist to this tornado?
That male me dose my words
…No breath.
I yant wou now! 

RAWLOVED*

First look since few days, and the rush of snatching your soul and your body is growing more like a fired up bull of tiny hungry angels...the raw, love feeling...

Still can't find those flawless terms that reflects the beauty of your pure being to speak them down here on my facebook wall, I knew how much green eyes would say, lie and pretend passion but when I saw yours it's just...not like that, honesty is the title, sensuality is the theme, and raw love is what I feel right now, full stop, hold on a second, I didn't realise some of my dreams, soon I won't be alone in the garden I told you about, because all you will sit by my side under the tree, then...nothing but the warmth of your body, I pull your hair and I hear your heart beats and I must share chocolate and coverlet with you, and a movie at the cinema and zoo as you promised, and everything... :(

and P S : next time when one of us will bring the food from you know where I won't wait the rest of my life for you to look at me in the eyes...I was taken by the romantic sweet music of Metalica...I need that moment back....it's raw,ffff it's love...you're love

unexplicablly it must be you ♥
Lotfy Angel

Witness! Soul Of Snail

Witness! Soul Of Snail

I'm a murderer! Yes I'm a snail assassin. I didn't mean to kill you; I didn't mean to crush you, ouch! I wish I could save you and get you back to the herbs in where your asylum is shoke by the wind and revived by cold rain diamonds. I know you're too lazy and I know you're too slow incredible and sticky but you had always been my favorite living toy since I was five... so witness baby snail.

You have an artistic shell but it's so breakable, you tried to cross the road but you passed away in the middle, and I believe your innocent soul still hovering in the garden of my love fantasy just like a drunk helicopter...now witness my prayer to the eternal lord, witness the birth of those pearls escaping from my mouth, my male and my veins and the peaceful way it's sent to my lover from the satellite, chilling Jesus of my lover’s neckless, witness the screaming of the jinn living in the thin body of the brown cat which may wish to have sex with me, but no way,not with a cat. Witness! And go then come back to witness, witness soul of snail and hear well how my rawloved is singing sweet Je Suis Malade of Charles Aznavour. Witness! The insane devotion of my heart and my “Safa and Marwa” that Muslims do in Mekka each year. All that is played in the theater of the garden of my rainbowed love fantasy. Soul of snail Y U NO WITNIS? You're a good boy and you obey, so go to my baby and tell my baby to come to me, I need my baby beside me in the garden of my love fantasy.

When you’ll come back I’ll give you a loly pop candy then you can fly away to the paradise of snails and chocolate lovers and condom (préservatif) players and cats and dogs and angels and cute snails and beautiful ugly snails and devils and Gaga snails and Zion snails and all; just go and bring me all what I need, all what I need is my one and only baby.

(The Cat, The tree, The garden, me, The destroyed house of the snail , My Samsung and the voice of my Rawloved*) 

                Lotfy Angel

 

Words I Am

I’ve never found the perfect words to write down neither my true chaotic entity’s dimension nor my heart attacks, and I won’t…
Never found appropriate ones to tell somebody or at least myself…words that define my perspective about this world that I don’t even know and I don’t want to. Words that confess the silent way I’ve been through those “loud” years I lived. God knows the depth and the sight.

I say “chaos…knives’ stabs…faces collectors…escapes…chained tears…love wonderland…religion’s truth…fun or mom who lived the hell just for me and sister to survive…the many times I faced death because I don’t know why…dances through the wind and rolling in the greenness that still make me feel comfortable. The piece of bread and cheese is enough…they had those burning words but I made mistakes that I definitely learnt from and I’m thinking of making few more”. Yes! the mistake has been my dream of a colorful sky were I’d have my little brother Isaak whom I learn how to swim and to ride a bike and when he comes back from school, I’d be the one whom he’d hug tight before mama. That would be me, another one more though and unseen…then I go back to that desperate fight with my eyes shut.

I’m proud of every single big, small, rough, fake, teasing, loving, disturbing, dramatic, choking, funny, happy, sad, said and mysterious word that made me none and everything of that, and I’m grateful that my heart still beats, louder and faster than he’d never beaten before!, and I’ll keep on being as real as I’m meant to be.
  Lotfy Angel

 

 

Green Eyes Said It All

Today I’ve been walking into a shiny crowd

Watching your face coming slow made me lose focus

I noticed that magical spark into your eyes and I found,

Your foot steps were a prove and your talk was a bonus

Narrate the chapters of your epic story

Then remember, guess and think carefully

Act and react just to seduce me smoothly

When I pretend to believe what you’re telling me

You’re nice, you’re fine, you’re bright

You’re so pretty, you’re funny and all

Tell a thousand lies I never mind

Baby those green eyes said it all

Today I’ve talking to a dangerous angel

I forgot all my troubles and I let everything down

All the good things you told and did were so evil

Bittersweet though here’s my love crown

Narrate the chapters of your dramatic story

Then remember, guess and think carefully

How you saved lives, you’re broken, you love perfectly

When I pretend to believe what you’re telling me

You’re so sweet; you’re one of a kind

You’re smart and somehow unusual

But I would add that you’re so shy

Baby those green eyes said it all

Princess Of My Heart

  Believe me that words have never been enough to “speak” the way I’m fond, inspired and respectful to your strong and amazing personality.

   I bet you’re the girl that everyone dreams about, the girl that we want to have now and forever…it’s just not up to me and you don’t know how much I got impressed when you always advise me and learn me how to stay a good boy by mentioning verses from the Holy Koran and from the speech of prophet Mohammed (Peace be upon him). I’m truly proud and grateful to your mom and dad that I know I’ll meet one day…and I’ll kiss them in their forehead and tell them you have one rare awesome girl!

Last Monday I saw the begging woman in front of the mosque you waited for me to get out from and I did my duty as I promised you darling, and you were right, it’s such a unique moment of inner peace and satisfaction. Then I bought some candies to her cute kid, and by the way no one but you should be the mother of our future Sam, Fatima Zahra and Isaak whom I imagined would look like that kid, it’s crazy I know right!

I wish from the bottom of my heart that all good boys find such a perfect, well almost perfect girl like you, I said almost because sometimes you drive me insane when you wake me early morning just to pray Al Fadjr when I only had slept for two hours because I had stayed online and this makes me so LOL because you know why honey.

   Stay the same unusual flower that beautifies my life’s garden…stay always the one and only princess of my heart. Love you endlessly

                                                Yours, Your Angel

My Chocolateful Flower

Little woman yet a big girl; you’re the brightest rubies I’ve known in my whole life. Wight like cotton candy and fierce like a kitty cat yet so sweet and adorable like a true doll. I won’t count the times you were there for me when you gave me your hand and hold it with mine, for me not to feel alone and abandoned, you’re such a special source of magic and security.

   Sweetheart, I know I haven’t been a perfect guy but at least I tried my best to be so. I’ll never forget the wonderful day s we spent together; the day we bought some durmast (البلوط) and yogourt then we went walking and drinking it and everybody was starring at us as if they had never seen too persons drinking yogourt before…?! Well and the day I broke my arm against the desk when I was about to kiss you, this makes me LOL so much and you know why babe.

I won’t forget that rainy day we went downtown only to get some chocolateful macaroon that I love, and sorry because we went back to the campus all wet…thank you honey.

Thank you for every single smile that keeps me breath, joyful and me. You know you were born to make me happy. Who would understand and teach and give me that affection I always needed, who would but you?

  So thank you for the love and the fun and the healing; you’re such a spark that enlightens the road of my life and keeps my heart beating loud. Stay the same unusual flower that beautifies my life’s garden. Love you endlessly
                                             

             Faithfully, Your Angel

Before You Go (When he's in love with him)

P S: These lyrics are based on a true story.

I may see you tomorrow, I may not

I may still feel this sorrow, please do not

Keep that distance in between us, not that wide

Break it and give me all the love that you hide

Because you know that I need it more than ever

Boy, it’s high time to hold our hands together

And please me if I’ll be myself and I’ll vow

To take my heart and keep it safe before you go

Sometimes I hallucinate your whispers

Desperately overwhelmed, I’m devastated in silence

Would it be my last chance before the goodbye?

Could I by magic hold you close and tight?

Because you know I want you now and forever

Baby, it’s high time to be one so let’s get together

And forgive me about the over passion that I’ll show

So give me your heart I’ll keep it safe before you go 

Evasion (Escape Frech Version)

Ce regard foudroyant a envahi mon esprit
Je me souviens encore de ces yeux affamés
La hâte s'est emparé de mon corps
Lors que je fonds dans cette fantaisie

Je semble gelé mais je peux nous voir
Fondre dans notre paradis glacial
Ainsi je me libère ce soir
Car je suis prêt à exploser ce qui m’emprisonne

Quand je pense à toi je ne peux m'évader
J'atteins cette brulante scène rouge
En me flamboyant de ton amour
Quand je pense à toi je ne peux m’évader

Ainsi, j’ai tremblé en pensant que cela été réel
Et j'ai continué à vivre et croire ce que je ressentais
Lorsque cette gourmande nuance a secoué la scène
Le goût irrésistible a fait mon corps crier

C’est comme si que mes yeux étaient bandées, mais je peux nous voir
S’éclipser dans notre sombre paradis
Donc, je renonce à ce qui me pèse ce soir
Car je suis prêt pour un vol grandiose


Quand je pense à toi je peux m’évader
J’atteins ce vilain rêve délicieux
En volant dans l’obscénité d’un monde merveilleux
Quand je pense à toi je peux m’évader

Escape (Dirty Paradise)

That withering look invaded my mind

I still remember those hungry eyes

The rush is taking over my body

While I’m sinking through this fantasy

I’m like frozen but I can see us

Melting in our icy paradise

So I fire up what squeezes me tonight

Because I’m ready to explode this tight

When I think of you I can escape

I reach that burning red scene

Blazing over your love when seen

When I think of you I can escape

So I trembled when I thought this was real

And I kept on living and believing what I feel

When that greedy touch rocked the scene

The irresistible taste made my body scream

I’m like blindfolded but I can see us

Shining in our dirty paradise

So I give up what weighs me down tonight

Because I’m ready for a bombastic flight

When I think of you I can escape

I reach that sweet naughty dream

Flying in the wonderland of obscene

When I think of you I can escape

Beyond Your Friendship

I’ve been searching for a while but now you’re found

So would you get me up from the ground?

It’s been boring and there’ve been so many things to hide

Just get prepared for an extraordinary ride

Because my heart can’t stop racing

When I’m next to you I can’t stop trembling

Our eyes could read what they’re sending

To each others as yours are hypnotizing

Take my hand and don’t be shy

Free your mind and let us fly

When I’m with you I’m on a trip

I want to go beyond your friendship

We’ve been so nice and too polite

We’re both satisfied by the inside and the sight

We met many times and we hanged out

Well you’re a special friend with whom I figured out

That my heart can’t stop racing

When I’m next to you I can’t stop trembling

Our eyes could read what they’re sending

To each others as yours are hypnotizing

Get closer; you know it gets me high

Now as you are completely mine

All I need is a good little flip

For us to go beyond our friendship 

The Butterfly Call

This is crazy, I mean so crazy

I bet the phone has felt in love too

The night goes so happy

And the mirror can’t believe it’s you

The bed gets warm, it shines

The pillow claims too heads

The walls could shake and whine

They’ve heard all what’s been said

So everything keeps on dreaming

Even though it’s an awakening

Sooner you’re coming

Such a butterfly flying

So damn crazy

One A.M, voices have been two

The room tells you come to me

From the door or the window

The bed gets warm, it shines

The pillow claims too heads

The walls could shake and whine

They’ve heard all what’s been said

Call ended

The pen gets excited

After he’d trembled

He said;

“Oh! Dear cloud

You try to bring me the spirit

The shadow and the sound

Now with the senses seal it

I can see fireworks

But the butterfly should come

Now nothing is blur

Eyes closed and the wish is done

Because once I’ll see the butterfly

A wonderful party would be my life

…regards”